Mmmmm! This Paste Is Delicious!

"Foundering" or "found her ring," you decide...

Well, hello, y'all! It's Dave the Goof, reporting for doody...

Monday crawls to its conclusion, bringing April 15th another hour closer... Ah, who cares... it's just money, right? Hey, if I don't pay the feds, will you all come visit me in prison? That would be so cool if you did... think of the chats we could have then! Of course, tickets to Guantanamo Bay aren't cheap, but I shall assume my friendship is worth it to you!

Got a good amount of work done today - not quite done with the next comic just yet. I don't want to post it up "almost ready", just to beat some arbitrary deadline, I hope you don't mind. Actually, I bet you already forgot that I post comics up here, didn't you? Come on, admit it...

Talked to Josh today - my web designer pal on the east coast that is working on Rug Care Central for us. He says by Tuesday, we'll be able to take a look at what he's done with the shopping cart section of the new site! Yay! Soon, you will all be able to go there and buy all the rug design bookmarks I've created! You can collect them all, just like Pokemon cards! Think of it! You will be the envy of all (2) of your friends!

I'm kidding. I won't exploit our friendship to guilt you into buying a rug design bookmark, don't worry. In fact, as a sign of good faith on my part, I will now post a picture I took tonight of me and my sweet Maggie.



There. I'm the one on the left, by the way. Now I ask you, how can you doubt my intentions, when I have such a sweetie pie for a daughter? By the way, she's laughing in the picture because I just farted. Well, it was an honest misunderstanding... she said, "Say cheese!" and I thought she said, "Dad, please cut the cheese for me, like the good old days, when life was simple and the root beer flowed like fresh Spring water."

I'm sure you can see how it was an honest mistake.

Todayve In History: April 14th
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- April 14, 1859: A Tale of Two Cities, by Charles Dickens, is published. (You could buy it for 10 cents. "It was the best of dimes, it was the worst of dimes...")

- April 14, 1865: President Lincoln was shot in the Ford Theater by John Wilkes Booth. (That Booth guy was one sick semper tyrannis...)

- April 14, 1912: Titanic hits the iceberg and sinks. (Sucks for them)

Gotta make a run down to Tax Man tomorrow (and his side kicks, Calculator Boy and Extension Girl), to get my Doom Package, so I can fire off some dough to Uncle Sam. Goodness know, he needs the money, no doubt to fund a study on how much bourbon it takes to make a goldfish drunk, or some other insanely important research. Gotta do my part to help further useless science! How else will we finally prove that there is no God, if not by studying the effects of sad movies on wildebeests and hippos? Goodness me!

I ain't got no video clip for you today! I've been posting too many lately, so I am punishing myself (on your behalf) so that I may learn the fine art of restraint. I should also be punished for talking about golf yesterday, I'm sorry.

On second thought, forget it! It's my blog, I can talk about golf if I want! So there! The nerve of you all, to scold me for talking about a hobby of mine on my own blog! In fact, here's a funny golf-related pic, just to stick it to you!



When you're playing *really* badly, sometimes they'll send a bear after you... it's allowable under USGA rules and guidelines. And if you hit the bear with your putter, it's a two-stroke penalty...

Well, I guess that's it for tonight. Sorry, Bob, didn't watch any Big Bang Theory yet, but I will...

Until tomorrow, remember, bad taste is better than no taste at all...