Tuesday, July 14, 2009

How Much Would You Charge to Run Into an Open Manhole?


"Tennis courts" or "Ten escorts," which one?

I know which one I'd pick! Woohoo! (Dave moves his eyebrows up and down, and smirks.) Yup, that's right... I do love me some tennis...

What? What did you think I meant?

Interesting day today! Stayed up ridiculously late reading, as is my custom. The book I'm reading (Red Seas Under Red Skies) has taken a sharp turn toward "Lame". It really has drifted into mediocrity, which is unfortunate. I was hoping to nurse this book along until Best Served Cold comes out July 29, but I don't think I have the stomach for it. At this point, the only reason I'll consider finishing it is so that I can write a review of it for Amazon.com... It's hard to explain, it's just blah. The characters are shallow, wasted shells of good ideas, and in this particular case, he's setting up the two main characters toward a big confrontation with not one, but three (so far) epic baddies, each with their own unstoppable henchmen. It would be cool if it was in the hands of a competent author, but in this case, it is limp and confusing.

Had some long-postponed errands that finally were taken care of today. Took Eldest Daughter to the DMV so she could get her California ID Card. Going to the DMV is always an epic event, but she's worth it. After that, we went to Citibank to open her her own checking account. Lunch and Starbucks rounded out the afternoon.

After that, we went to watch her friend Cole pitch a baseball game at Escondido High. He was very impressive, actually. His consistency impressed me. They pulled him in the eight inning, even though it was obvious he could have gone all 9. They had a 10-3 lead at that point, so I'm sure they didn't want to burn his arm out unnecessarily. Man, I haven't been to a ballgame in eons. Felt good to kick back in the stands and act like I knew a lot about baseball, like all the other middle-aged men in the stands. I was affiliating! That A was met today, at least! Now if I can just get the other 5 met, I'll be cookin'.

Fast food dinner, of course.

Random Thought of the Day: My computers are getting a bit loud. I think I need to crack them open and blow the dust out of them with some compressed air. I wonder if I should use compressed air on my kids when they get too loud? I guess I do, in a way. I manufacture my own compressed air, if you catch m' drift...

I have to post something funny from Hulu. My apologies to those of you outside of the US. Hulu is lame like that... anyway, it's a skit from Saturday Night Live with Justin Timberlake in it, and I laugh every time I see it... that's a pre-requisite for being posted here. It's a bit off-color in two places, I'm sorry...



I love that he makes fun of himself so effectively, but the thing I love even more is his delivery. Watch his eyes - man, it's all about the eyes with me. Usually, I have trouble with SNL skits, mostly because they normally aren't funny, but also because the actors in the skits always have their eyes locked on a teleprompter, which kills it for me. Timberlake obviously memorized his lines well, so he was able to move around, and act with his face well. Compare when Andy Samberg enters at the end... his eyes become fixed on an off-screen teleprompter and he becomes a talking statue.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it.

Funny Picture Time:


Ah, nothing whispers "redneck" like bacon-scented/flavored lip gloss. Because a woman's kiss should always remind you of breakfast...

I played some Mass Effect today. This is my second attempt at playing it since I bought it for Christmas last year. It has been recommended (highly) to me recently by both Zack and Warmonger Smurf, so I thought I'd plunge in again. Honestly, it just doesn't click with me. Maybe it's the third-person, over-the-shoulder perspective, or the sci-fi storyline, or having to juggle multiple members of a party instead of just one, I don't know. It's a well-beloved game, so I'll keep playing and hope it clicks... at times like this, I wish I was but a simple peasant.

Also played some more of Painkiller Black today, on the Nightmare difficulty level. Great game, really. Just a straight-up run-and-gun game for the most part, but it has terrific level design and wonderful sound effects. I always appreciate those things in an FPS game, as I'm sure you all do! Let's see... my favorite FPS games of all time? Dang, that's a hard one... if I were to create a list, it would probably be something like this...

My Favorite FPS Games
----------------------------
* Call of Duty
* Battlefield 2
* Unreal Tournament
* Half-Life
* Fallout 3
* Serious Sam 1
* Descent
* Oblivion
* Half Life 2


OK, so I cheated a bit... Oblivion was more of a first-person hack-n-slash RPG, and Descent was a 360 degrees-of-freedom hovercraft-type game, but I included them anyway. I had crazy-fun with all of those titles... except perhaps Half-Life 2... I included that one because the story was very compelling and the gravity gun was so awesome. I didn't play enough of Bioshock to include it here guilt-free, and even though I played Duke Nukem and all the Quake games through more than once, I don't really have a warm space in me for them at all, like I do the other games. I once had a marathon session of Descent that was 8+ hours, if memory serves (this was over a decade ago... 1996 I think), and as I tried to go to sleep, whenever I closed my eyes, I was moving down corridors shooting floating robots. That was my first real experience with full-blown sensory overload. I didn't sleep much that night...

Lots of good feedback on my new photo series involving Vye's Hair, which is encouraging. And now that his gender has been firmly established (didn't know there was any uncertainty in that regard!), I can proceed with abandon. Look for more soon.

In fact, in honor of my favorite artist Rembrandt's birthday on July 15, 1606, I give you Self-Portrait with Vye's Hair, by Rembrandt/D.Wagner.

Ah, when two great artists collaborate, it's a beautiful thing... I'll see my lawyer about this as soon as he graduates from law school...

Got a couple Dave-O pictures for you, which I 'borrowed" from the photo album of one of his mates over there on the other side of the world, where he's stationed...

Dave-O in his element. Ah, envy. Hail to the king, baby...

Lots of pics in that Facebook photo album, but for some reason, this one really struck me. Oh, he's just like any other man, only more so.


Hilarity. Dr. Jones, surely you don't think you can escape from this island...

I think I'll pull the plug now. Now go away or I shall taunt you again! Until tomorrow, remember, if you want to join the People's Front of Judea, you have to really hate the Romans.

27 comments:

Bobinho said...

last sentence is from The Life of Brian :D

Bobinho said...

title is from Animal Crackers :D

Bobinho said...

"at times like this, I wish I was but a simple peasant" = Pink Panther

David Wagner said...

Bob's in it for just the points, baybay! w00h00! 15 points, boom. The man's a pro.

Bobinho said...

that's right baybay!!! :P

havah said...

"I'll see my lawyer about this as soon as he graduates from law school..." is from Duck Soup.

"Hail to the king, baby..." is from Army of Darkness.

"Oh, he's just like any other man, only more so." is from Casablanca (one of my personal favourites)

The SNL skit is funny. I never watch those shows. But then I don't have cable/satellite, so I don't watch anything, really!

I probably shouldn't admit this, but if that's sensory overload, then I've had it with both Zelda and Mahjongg. I really can't explain the latter... :o

havah said...

PS Hulu should be fine internationally if you use a proxy ;)

David Wagner said...

15 points for Havah. BOOM! It'll be tough to catch you at this pace, unless Bob can get some speed round points before you snatch them all up...

havah said...

Once I start going to bed at a normal time, I'll be sunk! *lol*

Night now...time to try snooze again...

marky said...

Mass Effect is a brilliant game. Actually, I'm going to check when the next one's out.

Dave-O, lose the guns mate. Claymores are more fun......And I don't mean the exploding kind!

Vye said...

It's been hot lately, I doubt there is enough dust buildup to cause a cooling problem, but if your skeptical you can just pop open the case and have a peek. If you see a lot of dust then you can clean it out with some canned air. If you do clean your computer, don't forget to blowout the fans on the graphic cards (fans of which you are probably hearing) as those run hotter than anything else.

Abbie said...

haha dave, i did like the SNL skit!! nice choice.... dave-o, i miss him!!! :(
Dr. Jones, surely you don't think you can escape from this island = raiders of the lost ark
and yay for oldest daughter getting her CA id!! good work!!

Abbie said...

oh, and haha, btw dave, the line from the last post about "i love me some nitrates" and the line from today, I do love me some tennis" totally remind me every time of the line "I love me a little contact Petey!", from my all time favorite movie, of course :D

havah said...

I'm sorry I didn't comment on the photographs last night, but thanks for posting them, Dave. I don't know Dave-O, but still...I'm around military folk a lot, and I appreciate them.

There is something striking about the middle one, btw.

David Wagner said...

5 points for Abbie, woohoo!

Hey, Abbie, I tried Googling that Petey quote but couldn't locate it. What film is that from?

havah said...

Even I found it, Dave! For shame! :p

Avari said...

Probably Remember the Titans. That's her favorite film. Just a guess

Avari said...

Dave, how do you eat out so much and not get fat? In fact, how do you take in that many calories and not get fat? That will always amaze me.

That grosses me out that chap stick. Well, maybe that's just cuz I don't eat pig.

I like your picture. Those look like lion King trees

David Wagner said...

I stay thin(nish) on a strict regimen of anxiety, anger and anchovies. It's called the Three-A Diet. Gonna try the Three-B Diet next... bitterness, bowel-pain and bologna...

The Three-C involves a Colonic... I'd rather not do that one...

Abbie said...

haha, 5 points for Shannon!!! :D yep, its remember the titans, lol... and i was just going from my memory, i couldn't find it on IMdB to verify if i was quoting it right, lol :D

Claudette said...

I can never be as good as you, Dave.

Paula Titus said...

You can clean out your pc? Not that I'd ever be brave enough to try. I get nervous just emptying the cookies. Whatever that is.

Funny SNL clip! Love the pics of Dave-O, especially the first one. I refuse to sign up for Facebook because I know it would suck me in like a hungry Hoover.

Vye said...

Cookies are little text files your browser stores that contain unique strings of text that identify you to the web server. HTTP is a stateless protocol so it has no way of identifying you from the rest of us.

Why do webservers need to be able to tell the difference between you and me?

So they can keep track of your preferences, shopping cart contents, and other settings specific to you.

An example of this would be when you navigate to Google you can set some search preferences without logging into your Google account. When you save those preferences Google stores a cookie on your machine with a unique string. Then, the next time you visit Google their web servers will ask for that cookie and set your preferences accordingly.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to find Carmen San Diego.

Vye said...

and btw... If a woman ever kissed me with bacon lip balm on, I'd puke all over her. That would be the worst.

havah said...

"Now go away or I shall taunt you again" is from Monty Python and the Holy Grail

David Wagner said...

5 more for Havah. BOOM! That's the last quote for this post.

havah said...

thank you :)