Wednesday, September 2, 2009

My Shirt Size is "Medium Husky"...


"Leg bone" or "beg loan," which one?

The middle of the week snuck by when we weren't looking! What's up widdat? And how come the word "snuck" is showing up with a red line under it in my edit window? Snuck is a word, ain't it? Hey, now "ain't" is underlined! That's ungood... I mean, now that I'm a real writer, I should be using real words, yes? Crap... now "ungood" has a line under it... I give up. I'll never be a real writer... it's no use, Doc... I'll never learn to talk good...

I was behind a car the other day and I snapped a pic of it from behind. It was the weirdest looking vehicle I've seen in a good, long time. Here's the pic.


It says it's made by Nissan, but it also says "cube" on it, and "krom", which I assume, because of the line over the O, it's pronounced "Chrome". If it really is the Nissan Cube, then it certainly is aptly named... it's like a little box on wheels. And it has this ridiculously bizarre asymmetrical design... what was wrong with symmetry, I wonder, that they had to jettison it to that degree? What you can't see in the pic is that the back window starts on the left there and then wraps all the way around the side and up the passenger side.

Aw, heck, lemme go grab a link - if it's a Nissan, it must be on their website...

OK, yep, it's obviously on their site. Here's a 360 degree rotatable view of the thing. LINK That is, without doubt, one of the oddest street legal cars I've seen. Just when I got used to the PT Cruiser, they released the Mini Cooper... and then when I got used to that, they rolled out the Smart Car... now this? I notice in the pic on the website, it has a little antennae on top toward the back... that's probably so you can radio for help once it dawns on you that you're driving around a big cartoony box. "Help! I'm in a box! It ain't easy being cheesy!"

Anyway, probably not news to any of y'all, since you're all so much more hip than I, but still, I couldn't help but shake my head at that one. I notice that the "Kroms" are the most expensive variation. Makes sense... if I'm going to drive around in a big box, I want it to be the best and the fastest box around. "Oooh, but think of all the interior room!" Well, sure... it's a friggin box!

Harsh segue! OWWW!!!!

I was working from home on Monday, and the fam came back from the mall - always a mildly unnerving event. "What did they come home with today?" I usually ask myself... well, on Monday, my three-year-old came tearing into the house, beside herself with excitement. "Daddy! Guess what I got! Guess what I got!" Of course, it's a rhetorical question when it comes from a three-year-old... she's gonna show me what she got, and ignore any attempt at a guess anyway...

Here's what she was so excited about getting...


Apparently, one of the Bath and Body-type shops at the mall was selling little bottles of scented hand sanitizer, a buck each. Wifey bought her five, and you'd think it was Christmas, her birthday and Hannukah all rolled into one. "Look, Dad! I got hannitizers!" I guess I taught her to make up words, too... anyway, she had me smell each one, to see how awesome each one was, and she carries them around in one of her little purses, smelling them, and occasionally actually using them too.

She's odd. Just the way I hoped she'd be.... She's crazy with a side of crazy! woot!

Got a cool site for you to check out today... since most of us are writers to one degree or another, you might like this site that shows pictures of various professional writers (of Fantasy and Sci-fi, no less) and the places where they write their books at. Here's a couple from the gallery...

See? He's down. I don't know what that means, but he's down...


Wow, I always wondered who lived here... I just thought it was Clay Aiken or something...


Haven't you heard? Goofy is the new handsome.


Kind of cool to see where all the magic happens. I haven't heard of all of the authors, but it's fun to peek in on them, in any case. There's one pic of a guy sitting at a desk, with only candles for light, writing longhand in a notebook. I did notice a theme running through most of the pics... tons of books, and the presence of small animals. I wonder if having a pet helps real writers to write? I have a ton of books around me, so that's a step in the right direction. But no pet. Does posting cat videos on my blog count? I hope so...

On a sad note, my brother John said today that he thinks reading books should be outlawed, along with vehicles in FPS games. He has his reasons for both opinions, but I don't recall what they were. I was too stunned. I felt like the wind was knocked out of me... then I realized it was just me passing gas... when I was done chuckling at my own gas, I tuned back in to John talking, but he'd already given his reasons, and I was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself, so I let it go. Then I let another one go... it was that type of day...

Funny Video Time!

"Houston, we have a problem..."

The Gutbuster of the Day, from This Is Why You're Fat...


Behold! The self-explanatory Macaroni and Cheese Pancakes! Your fun is only limited by your imagination, I guess... by the way, I noticed that This Is Why You're Fat is releasing a recipe book now, lol.

Well, I don't have much more to offer for tonight. Come back tomorrow for another dose! And don't forget to check out the Director's Cut of today's post over at Wagnervana! Just do it or I'll light my hair on fire and start punching myself in the face!

Until tomorrow, remember, alcohol equals puke equals smelly mess equals nobody likes you!

PS Speed Round on yesterday's unclaimed quotes begins now!

22 comments:

Bobinho said...

title is from 50 First Dates

Bobinho said...

"Just do it or I'll light my hair on fire and start punching myself in the face" is from Spanglish

Bobinho said...

"it's no use, Doc... I'll never learn to talk good" is from Oscar :)

Bobinho said...

speedround:

"Your alliance would be a disgrace! Your name would never even be mentioned by any of us" = Pride and Prejudice

Bobinho said...

"Doesn't he have a noble brow? If I were a boy, I'd want to look just like that" = Little Women

Bobinho said...

"Look at me! I'm the King of New York" = Newsies

David Wagner said...

Dang! Bob is rockin' it! 15 points for today's quotes, 15 more points for yesterday's unclaimed quotes...

havah said...

That car reminds me of a computer generated puppy. Please don't ask me why...I have no idea.

Aww...your youngest is cute, Dave. I get like that over stationary. Or is it stationery? Anyway...I never knew there were scented hand sanitizers. I might use them if I found some.

Cool author website. I want to see if anyone writes where I write, that way I can see who I'll be when I grow up! :D

Gee, Dave. I thought Chicago was supposed to be the windy city! :o

Funny video: I wonder where that guy ended up? I mean, other than the Emergency Room.

havah said...

Okay, so Gregory Frost is the about the closest, except he doesn't have a ton of paper around. Did you notice how almost all of them had a paper fountain? It makes me feel oh, so much better! :D

Abbie said...

speed round:

we bare our souls and tell the most appalling of secrets = Little Woman

Well, for starters, you could give me your left arm = el maquinista

You're standing on ground where I've buried hundred. This is my land = Reign of Fire

Abbie said...

Oh dave I know! Isn't the new cube ridiculous!! it drives my little bit of meloncholy insane because the window only wraps around one side!! agg, I would never ever get one of those,lol, and I like nissan :P

Maggie is so cute! that is funny! I was at the mall too! but I didn't see them :(

Abbie said...

alcohol equals puke equals smelly mess equals nobody likes you = the wedding singer

Your fun is only limited by your imagination = bedtime stories
(was that a good movie? I wanted to see that one too, lol)

Haven't you heard? Goofy is the new handsome = Bedtime stories :)

David Wagner said...

Abbie is rockin it too! Dang! Did I really put that many quotes in Sep 1's post? I lose track sometimes...

So 15 points for Abbie for the speed round, and 15 for today's post. You and Bob are both off to quite a start...

Havah, yup, unfortunately, every city I'm in becomes the windy city. Hey, it's good for a few laughs... and I need all the laughs I can get... I'm one lap away from 40, then my mid-life crisis can begin in earnest... until then, laugh, clown, laugh!

Crystal said...

Your daughter is too cute! You're never too young to make up words.

I need to crawl out from under my rock every once in a while...I only knew one of the movie quotes.

Abbie said...

well, I was hoping to find 4 speed round quotes so I could get a slight lead over bob, but that didn't happen :( but... there aren't quotes in the director's cut are there? that would be sneaky, lol :D

Unknown said...

Thanks for the SF writers link... too cool.

Krista said...

That is a cool site about where writer's write! I visted that site a few weeks back when my book club moderator posted that link. I thought it was pretty cool! He also wrote a cool blog post about Fantasy/Sci-Fi writers here
http://is.gd/2Qr5f
I think you might find it entertaining! LOL! (I'm carmen22)

Mac and Cheese Pancakes, what? Crazy! Another fun post, Dave! Best!

Way to go, Bob and Abbie, you guys rock!

Bobinho said...

bring your A-game Abbie ;)

Abbie said...

haha, A+ Bob, thats my goal :D

Joseph said...

Dave, you = the bomb.

The end.

havah said...

Oh, dear, I guess you're one year older than me then. Haha! Poor, Dave.
;)

Paula Titus said...

Outlaw books? Surely he was joking!

Cool writers site! I noticed none of them sitting at the kitchen table, like me. This may explain a few things.