Saturday, January 7, 2012

Oooh! Nice "Transformers" Reference, Dave! Now Go To Bed.


Aha! It has started! 

The new year, I mean. Not my car. You really I thought I meant my car? No, my car has not started! It's still in my garage, silly! Sheesh!

I mean the new year has started. I only mention it in case you weren't paying attention to the seasons, or haven't looked at a calendar in a while. As I write this sentence, it is a few minutes past midnight, January 7th, Pacific time. You're welcome. Yeah, I'm helpful like that... like a sextant, guiding you through the night while you drift through life's vast ocean... OK, fine, I took it a bit far there, sorry. Hey, it's late, and I'm tired...

So, where to begin, eh? Ah, yes, with a needless apology. *ahem* So, yeah, sorry for waiting a week to update again... a lack of interesting happenings and other inanities have conspired against me. But I have prevailed! I have overcome the ennui-generated obstacles and have successfully summoned the inner resolve to hit the "New Post" button and free-associate my way to yet another blogging success! 

Yes, I refer to this post. What, you don't think it's successful? You haven't even read all of it yet! How can you say that!?!?

OK, needless apology out of the way. Let's get down to business.

First things fourth (as I am wont to say). I got the video of the Christmas play uploaded to YouTube, and then followed it up by creating a page for it on my Wagnervana website. <-- Look! A convenient link! Why not click it, when you have, like, an hour or so with nothing to do! Then go watch it! [Dave travels forward in time 1 week, and checks the stats on the video... total views: zero! Doh! He returns to current time again]

Fine, be that way! Just because you have a life doesn't mean you can reject me like that! Don't you know I bruise emotionally very easily! Sheesh!

OK, fine, I need a funny animal picture to cheer me up...


OK, fine, that works... though it does hit a little too close to home... I am part-retriever... I mean, I also don't know what I'm doing.

Lemme try again...


Ah, that'll work. Cats save the day (yet again!). Let's see if anyone notices that it's a parody of the "Most Interesting Man in the World/Dos Equis" commercials...

Come on, now, don't get upset... I realize you're patiently waiting for me to tell you which book I've been reading... I mean, it's a new year, time to start a new book list, right? Sheesh, you're so impatient! I should make you wait longer, for being so rude... 

OK, fine, I'll tell you, since you'll never guess. I'm reading a book called The Riddler's Gift by author Greg Hamerton. Honestly, I don't recall where I heard of the book from... it might have been a fantasy website, or perhaps when I bought a book on Amazon, it was one of those "other people who bought this book also bought ___" type of things, who knows. All I know is that it was cheap (I bought it for a cool .99 cents), and I thought "why not"? 

So how is it thus far? Well, I'm at the crucial 15% mark... this is where I usually abandon books that don't do much for me (I figure 15% is a good, healthy shot), but I won't be abandoning this one. Initially, there were too many characters introduced at once, which almost lost me. But then the story took off, focusing on a couple major players, and I am sufficiently hooked. Beyond that, there are several traditional fantasy tropes present (a magical ring! Run, Frodo!), but they are handled fairly well. Once I get further in, I'll spill a bit more. Then, perhaps, a legitimate review will magically appear! *Gasp*!

You know what I wish? I wish there was a way to return a hard-copy of a book to it's publisher, and exchange it straight-up for a digital copy of the same book. 

Yep, of all the things I could wish for, I choose to mention that one. That's why they call me Dave the Mundane.

OK, a better question: Which superpower would you wish for? 

Come on, you know you secretly wish you were a superhero, admit it. So spill it... which superpower would you want? Traditional (fly, Superman!) or non-traditional. Me? Well, I suppose mine would be a variation of a traditional one... mind reading. Only I'd just like to know what people think when they see me approach and/or talk to me. Do people enjoy my company or do they wish I'd just wander away and leave them be?

Not much of a superpower... I should have wished for an adamantium endoskeleton... Why? Well, because an adamantium exoskeleton would make it unpleasant to hug me! And Lord knows how much I like to be hugged...

And now, a video called 100 years in Ten Minutes. Do you have ten minutes for a quick history lesson?


So I went to a writer's club meeting the other night. A new group of fine folk... fellow writers! My people! At least I think they were my people... I didn't check their papers, so I don't know who they have listed under "Owner"... it might have been me... anyway, it was a big group, which was the only real downer of the event. "Gee, Dave, why do you start with a negative?" Well, because I just experienced a flash of pessimism, that's why. But it has passed; I've transformed back into an optimist again! I'm in my prime! 

Yes, that was an Optimist Prime reference... sorry, it's late, remember? I'm operating on fumes here. And unfortunately, the fumes are mostly methane. [Dave cracks a window]

Where was I? Oh, yes, the writer's meeting. So, there were 16 people in attendance, and half of them (us?) had things to read to the group, which meant things needed to zip along fairly quickly, to avoid having the meeting run until midnight. I certainly understand. Still, I think 16 people is a few too many to make a meeting like that productive. I may look for a smaller group to join... one that's a bit closer to home as well, and hopefully on another night than Wednesday!

But again, great group of folks. Very interesting. I met a cool writer named Ed Coonce. Funny guy. I bought his book today. Here is his site. Check it out, eh! Eh! He's an actor and artist as well, like me! Only better, I'm sure...


Yeah, I know... looking at the clock as I write this sentence, it is almost 1am. Yes, it took me about an hour to write the post down to this point. A whole hour (almost)! See how much I love you? The devotion! The dedication! And here it only took you about 2 minutes to skim through it! That's all right... I know how much love a person can pack into two minutes... so I'll consider us even. (And I'll consider me odd)

I suppose I should stop now, and drag my sorry carcass off to bed. I'll think up some more nonsense for you soon, fret not! (By the way, never say "fret not" to a guitar player...)

Adios,

Dave the Odd

7 comments:

Rebecca said...

I think 16 is too large of a group for writers. You might want to look elsewhere.

Looking forward to watching the Christmas play!

Thanks for a great post!

The Writer Currently Known as Rory said...

All you'd need is 16 more writers and you'd have a "Flintstones" movie script, since that's how many took a pass on the 1994 movie, and look how that turned out.

Just Bob said...

Hey dave, bob here! :) happy new year!

I was just wondering, because I haven't read your blog in a while (my loss, i know), what happened to that book you were writing? tried getting it published? hope you succeeded!

All the best!

Regards,
B

logankstewart said...

I just so happened to have some free time, as well as a burning curiosity. The play was great, friend. I particularly loved the lines with the rhyme-time of query, very, hairy, Mary, marry, and the like. Good, funny stuff, plus a fitting message. And it was interesting (in a good way) to see you performing. It puts a tone to the Man Behind the Blog. All in all, good show, I say. Good show.

Happy New Year.

David Wagner said...

Rebecca: Yeah, 16 is a bit big... I'll keep looking. I liked the group I attended a year or two ago, with just the four of us. Maybe I can find something like that, here in Escondido. Hope you like the play!

Rory: Never watched The Flinstones movie... I figure, if I can't make it through a movie trailer without stomach cramps, then there's no way I'll try and watch the movie. That one didn't pass the "stomach cramp" test...

Bob: Not published yet! Not even finished yet! But when it is, you can be sure I will contact you and strain our friendship by asking you to buy a copy. Hey, I'll probably need a coffee that day, so your couple bucks will help!

Logan: How cool! You actually watched the play! And you liked it! Well, you can color me happy then. Thanks for taking the time. It was hard work, but a ton of fun. I hope they're all that fun from here on out.

Anonymous said...

Dave,
I watched about 3/4 of the play the day after you posted it - and really enjoyed it, but wasn't able to finish it due to pressing issues. I'll go back and finish it.

I had a thought: Rather than initially work in a group, it seems that Christian writers find success when they take a week and isolate themselves in a cabin (usually a friend's or their own, i.e. Beth Moore, Yancy etc.), away from media and family, distractions, to lay a solid foundation for their project. THEN you could regroup and share with a smaller bunch. There must be someone in your network who owns one, and I'm sure your boss would be generous with the time off :)

Just a thought.....

The Writer Currently Known as Rory said...

Rory: Never watched The Flinstones movie... I figure, if I can't make it through a movie trailer without stomach cramps, then there's no way I'll try and watch the movie. That one didn't pass the "stomach cramp" test...

Shockingly, the sequel, The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas, was marginally better, because at least Mark Addy and Stephen Baldwin seemed like Fred and Barney.

I expect Seth MacFarlane's "Flintstones" TV series to be light years better than those two, though.