Sunday, May 29, 2011

Hope, Tragedy and Extreme Manliness


Hmm... I like the uniqueness of the straight road cutting through the lake... and the asymmetric layout (as opposed to centering the road in the shot), but really, the mountainsides just aren't interesting enough to really make the shot zing. If the clouds were more dramatic, maybe it would have held the pic together better...

Lemme see what else I have...


OK, this one was taken in Israel, so that's a plus, cuz... you know... Holy Land and all that. The trees are unique, and I like the grouping. The overall color scheme is balanced well, with the beige/brown half and the blue/white half... but the foreground is too bland for my tastes. And for some reason, it just seems a bit too muddy overall for me. Needs more contrast and crispness.Believe it or not, I'm most drawn to the extreme right and left sides of the shot, right on the horizon line.

Let's see what else I got...

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THE PHOTO THAT WAS HERE was forcibly removed by a rabid band of alien invaders, let by a Man Named Aitor, who claims to have taken the picture and is deeply offended at my use of it in this venue... of course, no one but HE and I will ever know this, because no one will ever read this post again! MUAHAHAH!!!!  Love ya, Aitor! *smooch*
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OK, what else do I have...


OK, now this is even better. The picture has a nice vertical division to it, and a nice nostalgic feel. Old time baseball fans will immediately recognize the person pictured, as well as his unique delivery. He is obviously about to pass wind on that little man in front of him there... but picking on midgets has never been amusing to me. Of course, the picture could have the contrast bumped up. And I'd photoshop a goatee and a birthday hat on him, plus add a picture of a young Buddy Hackett riding a giraffe in the background. Other than that, I think it's a keeper, but still not worthy to lead tonight's post.

The search continues... OK, what else have I got?


This one is striking. A sculpture carved from a melon. I'm sure it was under-ripe, so that the material was firm enough to carve. Brings to mind the old saying about "when life gives you melons, carve it into a sculpture," which I'm sure was the artist's initial inspiration for the piece. Not sure why the guy on the right has a tire around his neck. Perhaps it's for an ad for Goodyear or something. And thankfully, the lady of the left is facing the other way. She appears to be exposing herself - and this is a family blog, so we can't have any of that around here. But overall, good contrast and color distribution, and the proportions are good.

Still, not a worthy opening picture. Maybe somewhere in the main body of the post. But I need a good one to lead. What else have I got?


OK, a weinerdog in a hot dog bun. Now we're getting close... The concept is good, but the execution is not quite there. The dog's snout is cropped off, for starters, and the flash was a mistake, since the shot is washed out. And the bun is sort of falling apart, which speaks to me of gross amateurishness and impatience. I'm sure the photographer is a liberal, so I'll cut him some slack. He obviously lives alone, and that's sad... he had to take the picture himself, plus he owns a weinerdog.

Still, a swing and a miss....


And we have a winner! So, it looks like my good friend Dave-O has been hastily photoshopped into a field of sunflowers, while the Hindenburg explodes in the background, in glorious black and white. It is a touching tribute to the military on Memorial Day... it projects hope (sunflowers), tragedy (Hindenburg) and extreme manliness (Dave-O) all in one shot. To me, it says, "In life, you will have hay-fever. And occasionally, things will indeed be black and white, and they might blow up. But fear not! Dave-O will be there, to take out the jerks sneaking up on your six. And all will be well in the world."

So much, conveyed in such a simple, beautiful picture.

OK, now I can begin tonight's post.

What? We're done? How is that possible!

Ah, well. I can't argue with the blog's sponsors. If I do, they'll send Baldie and Blondie back to torment me... can't have that.

Adios for now.

Dave

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

Not sure how strong my Mom's neighbor's wireless is, and it'll be few days before we get my internet connected, so I'm redeeming my "Get 3 blog entries for 1 comment" coupon.

Favorite picture - the stairs through the water.
Least favorite - the dog one. Couldn't he have found an bun that wasn't falling apart?
Most interesting - the tree. I don't care for brown grass, but years ago our family underwent an intensive psych eval (don't worry, I passed with flying colors :). He asked each of the kids to draw a picture of a house, and I learned that if they draw a tree next to the house, that that represents the dad (the house is the mom). My eyes were drawn instantly to the largest tree in this picture. The larger the tree, the more important the dad is to the child. Hmmmm, Dad passed 10 years ago, but I guess the move to AZ has him on my mind....

I'll pass on all current & future flatulence references. No pun intended :)

The extreme lengthiness of this comment should satisfy the coupon redemption.

BTW, you have a beautiful family.

Scrabble-Buddy, Beth

logankstewart said...

Call me a sucker, but that weiner dog picture is probably my favorite. I like the top one, too, though. And the third. Cool stuff. Looks like my backyard, here in landlocked Kentucky.

Michelle said...

Ok, so what I want to know is ...Who has time to carve a sculpture out of melon?? And if you do have time why would you choose melon over other edible mediums, such as cheese? Would the melon last longer or just smell better? It leaves me with too many unanswered questions.

David Wagner said...

Beth: That's interesting, about the trees. Thanks for the lengthy comment - consider your coupon redeemed! Hope you get settled into AZ ok.

Logan: You? A sucker? Never! Glad some of the pics appealed to you. I'll find more...

Michelle: Artists are nuts, plain and simple. Maybe if they display the melon art at like 55 degrees or some such, it lasts longer. Or maybe it has its day, and then lives on only in pics on crazy people's blogs... (no comment!)...

Dave-O said...

DAVE!!!!!! just figured out I can stream your blog on my phone!!! Which means.... wait for it...... I CAN FOLLOW YOU AGAIN even when I'm on the road working!!! Try as you might you can't be rid of me, lol, anyway, awesome photoshoping as usual, I really dig the combo of the field and the blimp. I was able to read the latest 4 blows and dig them. Hope all is well with ya brother, and if ya need me ya got my number, and if I can motivate myself i'll start my blog again soon. Take care sir, and good day.

aitor anton said...

I am the photographer of the third image, yo are posting it without my permission

http://www.albumdeaitor.com/2011/0422%20gaztelugatxe/index.html

David Wagner said...

Why, thank you for commenting on a post no one has looked at for two years! How kind of you! It makes me feel these old posts are worth viewing.

Honestly, you're kind of self-absorbed, aren't you? Why on earth would I need your "permission" to post a photo in this type of venue? Do you think I benefited financially from using it, lol? Do you feel I've done you harm in any way by sharing it with the 10 or so friends that actually read this crappy blog?

I have an idea... quit taking yourself so seriously. I will swap the photo out for some other photo, and then you can pat yourself on the back until your arms breaks. How about that?

Aitor Antón Sáenz said...

You need my permission to post the image because I am the owner of the copyright, so simple.

David Wagner said...

Wow, ok. Well, I guess I should have also got your permission first before tattooing your face on my left buttock....

David Wagner said...

There, in addition to the alpaca, I added a burping black guy... does that make it ok now, Aitor? If not, let me know, and I'll add more...

Aitor Antón Sáenz said...

Well, keep on with your jokes. I've put a reclamation on blogger. I don't know what part of the word "copyright" you don't understand.

Aitor Antón Sáenz said...

I have not climbed 231 steps with 7 kg of camera equipment for you then put the photo on your blog without at least the name of where you caught it.

You think you are very funny, don't you? Let's watch what happen.

David Wagner said...

What part of "NOBODY has looked at this post but you and I for 2 years" don't you understand? Seriously, dude... you "climbed 231 steps" and put the photos online for people to see, right? Well, me and about 10 other people saw it. It's a mediocre picture to begin with! It's ain't exactly Pulitzer material! And it's not like I'm making money off of it!

Get a life.

Aitor Antón Sáenz said...

I don't care how much people watch your fucking blog. The only thing that I care is that you posted my photography without my permission. What part don't you understand? Are you dumb?

David Wagner said...

Well, by all means, Mr. Grumpy Pants, tell me what you want? You want it taken down, or do you want me to add a website? Be clear, man! Otherwise I'll just keep tweaking the picture until I can claim it as my own! MUAHAHAHA!!!

Hmm... better make arrangements to get the tattoo of your face removed... Hmm...

Aitor Antón Sáenz said...

Stop kidding me and delete the photography, is very simple.

David Wagner said...

Fair enough! Consider it gone!

And thank you, by the way, for the link to your online photo album. I'll be posting more of your photos in an upcoming blog post. Stay tuned!

Aitor Antón Sáenz said...

Thanks.

David Wagner said...

You should see all the traffic to this post from the Canonistas forum! Thank you, for the extra exposure to my site! I should steal your photographs more often!