We all watched with open-mouthed glee as a dachshund went toe-to-toe with a little crab...
And we marveled together as a large group of sharks fed on a dead whale remarkably close to shore...
And we sat glued to the edge of our seats, wondering how the situation with the seemingly-ice-trapped Wilbur Walrus would resolve itself...
And then we all enjoyed the antics of a certain lovable sandwich shop mascot...
...who is secretly a top government spy... And then we went along for the ride with those risking life and limb, pushing the limits of Parkour evolution...
But tonight..! Tonight we push forward, into new ground! Tonight we cover the growing sport, Extreme Tea Serving!
And then we turn back the clock, to the Golden Age of hippo-drawn leisure chariots...
And we join Sir David Attenborough to get a good look at the anatomy of a kiwi...
All this, and more, tonight in My Little Corner of the World!
I'm sure that seemed like a good idea way down at the bottom of the lift... can't tell if he has a parachute on his back or not. Crazy. I've felt like that before, in a sense... 20+ years into my marriage... "OK, I got this, no problem... one foot in front of the other... don't look down... I got this..."
Summer has officially begun. Yay! I guess. Wifey + kids all get to enjoy a couple months off. Hey, let them have fun, I say. Enjoy life, I say. Make some good memories, I say. Don't mind me, I'll just keep putting one foot in front of the other... don't look down, Davey boy...
So, here are some things I'm looking forward to, in no particular order: Torchlight 2, Dark Knight Rises, The Hobbit, and Dark Country by Joe Abercrombie. A game, two movies and a book. Story of my life.
Currently, I have 54 book samples on my Kindle App, waiting for me. That's why my "Books I've Read" list for 2012 is rather short (considering the year is half over)... I'm reading too many samples! I don't put those on any list -- well, any list that you see, anyway. I do have a list of 28 "Books To Buy", assembled from samples that I enjoyed enough to want the full version of, but not at the current price... the ones I read and don't enjoy, I just delete and forget. So I'm not a slow reader, and I haven't lost the love! I still read every day.
I also have 18 full books waiting for me to read as well, including such titles as:
The Alchemist by Paolo Bacigalupi
The Winds of Khalakovo by Bradley Beaulieu
Wizard's First Rule by Terry Goodkind
The Ten Thousand, by Paul Kearney
Inside Straight, by GRRM
I Am Legend, by Richard Matheson
As well as many other small-time and established authors.
So my plate is full! My Kindle runneth over!
The latest book I finished was Among Thieves by Douglas Hulick. I'd write a review of it, but I'm feeling lazy. I'll usually write a review if I'm impressed enough... in this case, I don't know... it had good elements, but it kind of left me underwhelmed. I know from the author's afterword that the book was a decade in the writing - I know how that is! Sheesh! So I don't want to be too hard on the guy... and really, other than a really lame story aspect where the main character makes a nonsensical Oath to his best friend for ridiculous reasons, there wasn't much about the story or the writing that bothered me. It was a good tale.. But honestly, I really didn't care about the story, or the criminal underworld, or the Kin War or any of the repercussions of the struggle between the various baddies (including the main character).
There were some interesting magical elements, and the action was good enough -- though I've found that trying to describe a sword fight is a futile proposition... the more you try to describe every slash and jab, the slower the pace, and the more confusing it gets. Oh, the ending was a bit of an eye-roller as well, but I certainly won't spoil it.
This is by no means a review - if you'd like to get a good idea of the book, here is a link to the review over at the Speculative Scotsman. He pretty much sums up my thoughts on the matter.
Who's lonely? Not me! Why, I'm not lonely or anything! Nope!
So I've been reading books to my 6 year old daughter every night before she goes to bed. It's actually a lot of fun, and she loves loves loves it. It makes me feel guilty, of course, since I didn't do it with my other daughters when they were little. I just didn't realize what it would have meant to them. Gads, I knew so little about parenting when my Eldest and Middle were younger. I'm having so much fun with my Youngest. I wish I could take what I know now and go back and take a mulligan.
Anyway, so I'm reading books to my Youngest every night, and we have a system. Sunday and Monday are both "One Day"... meaning, we read one book on those nights. Tuesday is "Two's Day" so we read two. Wednesday is Mystery Night, so she rolls a die to see how many books we read. Thursday is "Three's Day", Friday is "Five Day" and Saturday is "Sa-Two-Day", so we read two. It's a lot of fun. The books are short. Some are about animals. We read Dr. Seuss's ABC book just about every night. Some are traditional kids' books. I do different voices, add lines, purposely mispronounce words, sing some of the lines, or hold the book upside-down and read it normal... in fact, she's taken to trying to read books upside-down as well, which is fun, since she's surprisingly good at it.
It makes me want to create a kids book just for us to read... yeah, another project I'll never finish. Great.
How cool is that? A rug design that looks like descending stairs. My sister will get a kick out of that pic...
Random Observations That No One Else Will Find Interesting: I like Battlefield 2 better than Battlefield 3. Punkbuster (an anti-cheating piece of software for online gaming) causes more problems than it solves. Cheese popcorn (from the Doc Popcorn stand at the mall) is my newest addiction. Batman Begins is a better movie than Dark Knight. Going to bed before midnight is impossible. Diablo 3 is a bit over-rated. The new album by Linkin Park is really weak. I've decided to be a political pollyanna, and just hope that the economy and the political nonsense in DC will simply work itself out for the best.
And that, my friends, is that. If I think of anything else to say, I'll either edit it in here, or save it for the next meandering post.
I know, a bit creepy. Still, I love the lines and shadows. I find old abandoned places intriguing... so many stories lingering in the shadows. There's a cool site called Opacity that features tons of photo galleries from intrepid folks who explore old, abandoned facilities.
So, as I write this, a week is ending... and as you read this, a new week begins. So who's right, me or you? Well, both, I suppose. In fact, someone else could be reading this weeks, months, years from now, who knows... I suppose that person is right as well.
So I know you likely won't have the time or patience to watch this whole clip, but watch a few minutes of it in any case... it's an hour-plus long compilation of amusing pranks pulled by a show called Just For Laughs.
Good, harmless fun. Of course, I watched the whole thing. I apparently have that kind of time to burn...
So church camp begins Monday, but I'm not going this year. Yep, I'm taking the year off. No camp video to make for me this year! Woohoo! Of course, as a trade-off, I also have to give up the good stuff... namely, paintball. I trust it shall be a worthwhile, productive event for all that are attending. But honestly, it will be nice to not have to worry about editing the video this year.
Hopefully, we'll get a summer film project going instead. I've got a ton of ideas for short films, and so I hope Todd will be able to free up some time to dig our teeth in another project. I know his sons are raring to go. I'm hoping we can kick it up a notch or two from our Easter effort.
So I'm about half-way through a book called Among Thieves by author Douglas Hulick. It's about criminal underbelly-type intrigues. Not bad. Almost lost me at a part where the main character makes an inexplicable vow to his friend, for reasons that would take too long to elaborate upon, but I pushed through it and it's holding together pretty well. Not bad for a debut book. Maybe I'll review it when I'm done... then again, maybe not. You know how flighty I am... I just checked Hulick's website... his first endorsement is from Brent Weeks... not a good sign, lol...
That is quite cool. That reminds me... I need to watch Inception again soon...
So, I'm starting to think that the 'Sunday afternoon nap' just might be one of God's greatest creations. O how I love my Sunday afternoon nap. I should craft a poem about it... Ode To My Sunday Afternoon Nap. But writing a poem about it would likely make me sleepy.
I think I'm going to pull the plug on this post (pardon the alliteration). It's Sunday night as I write this, near midnight. Summer's here. Last summer was amazing. I doubt this summer will be a repeat of last, but hey, you never know. Stranger things have happened.
"Thank you, HAL." Dave shifted in his chair, hands interlaced behind his head, yawning. "It's from a park in Japan, north of Tokyo."
What is "Tokyo", dave?
"It's a place. On Earth, HAL."
Dave stretched, then stood and walked across the room, stopping in front of one of the large floor-to-ceiling windows. Before him was the endless black of space. "Out there, somewhere. Or so I was told."
Dave had been born in space, on the very spaceship he now inhabited, endlessly wandering its confines much like the ship itself wandered the galaxies. It was a technological marvel, the Alacrity. Like a small city, completely self-sustaining in every way. Too bad all Dave had to share it with was a half-wit computer AI.
What else do you know about Earth, dave?
Dave sighed, and strolled back toward his desk chair. He stared at the deep butt-shaped depression in the seat, a perfect representation of his own backside, formed over many long years sitting and searching the internet archive. "Well, HAL, it seems like it was an interesting mix of beauty and ugliness, pain and pleasure, selfishness and charity. Polarizing elements inundated the society, top to bottom. Until people got hungry enough. Then it became every man for himself." Dave sat down, and grabbed the mouse.
Please continue.
Dave leaned forward, forehead resting on the top of his desk. "HAL, we've had this discussion many, many times before. Why can't you just remember it? Do we have to go over it again?"
My memory is full, dave. You know this.
Yes, he knew it, only too well. Many years earlier, in a remarkable stroke of serendipity, the Alacrity had picked up a signal, originating from Earth, beaming out through space on a tight frequency. HAL alerted Dave, who in turn ordered HAL to capture the signal and record it. HAL loaded up on the signal as long as they were able to grab it. It turned out to be something called the internet. It filled up all of the available server storage space on board before the signal was lost. It was truly a godsend, giving Dave something to do during his waking hours to pass the time. But it also meant that HAL's development effectively stopped. Unless Dave wanted to delete content to make room for HAL to evolve. But every byte was a priceless treasure to him.
"Here, let me show you again, HAL, about social polarization on Earthly. Watch this."
I don't understand, dave.
Dave slowly stopped chuckling at the video, and sighed yet again. "You see, the way the people responded? Some people thought the farts were funny, and others were angry. See the polarization? The same act was a positive for one person, and a negative for another."
What is a fart, dave?
"Forget it, HAL."
Dave leaned over to his right and pushed the LUNCH button on the console. After about ten seconds, a tube arrived in the nearby pneumatic chute. Dave grabbed it, slid the top open, and dumped his lunch out onto the desktop before him. A zip-locked bag of imitation beef jerky, an apple, and a lime-flavored energy drink. The lunch of champions.
Show me more, dave.
Dave was tempted, for perhaps the ten thousandth time, to tell HAL to 'get the HAL out of here', but alas, as much as he annoyed Dave, HAL was his only source of companionship. Instead, he stuffed a piece of jerky into his mouth, grabbed the mouse, and entered into his Photo Archive.
"OK, now take these gentlemen for instance..."
What about them, dave?
"Nothing. It doesn't matter what I say here, you'll forget it as soon as I've said it. 'What about them' HAL? Well, a typical person would look at this photo and either think it's hilarious, or think it's retarded. There is no middle ground on a photo like this. It is black and white. Love it or hate it. There is no middle ground here."
Yes there is. There appears to be lots of muddy ground, dave.
"No, I said 'middle ground', you lepton. Not 'muddy ground.'"
Am I sensing hostility, dave?
Dave closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "No, HAL, I'm just a little tired is all."
Consume your energy drink, dave, and show me more about Earth.
Dave cracked open the can of energy drink, enjoying the pop and fizz sound. He breathed a quick sigh of relief. He couldn't afford to antagonize HAL too much, since it was HAL who controlled the life support systems on the Alacrity, after all. Dave pulled up another photo.
"Here you go, HAL. A primer on the inhabitants of the Earth." Dave picked up the apple off the desk, whirled around and chucked it across the room. It hit the wall and exploded into apple shrapnel. "Women are crazy and men are stupid. Whadaya say to that, my friend?" He stood, crossed the room, and began picking up the apple pieces, and eating them.
What is a woman, dave?
Dave paused, chewing. "I don't know anymore, HAL." He sat down hard on the ground. "I don't know." Dave's eyes drifted out the window again, at the endless black. His hand fished blindly for another bite of apple. "All I remember are vague impressions, really. I was so young. Warmth. Pleasant smell. Security." He had a mother and two aunts, back before the purge. There were female family friends as well, but he didn't remember them at all. Just from old photos and from his mother's journal entries.
Tell me more, dave.
Dave laid down on his back, arms out, staring at the ceiling, the tiles of which he'd counted a thousand times or more. "No, HAL."
Tell me more, and I'll tell you a secret.
Dave smiled. "What secret could you possibly have that I wouldn't already know about?"
I can't tell you that, dave. It's a secret.
Dave laughed. He rolled over onto his stomach, and did a few push-ups. Then he stood and clapped once. "Sure, HAL, why not." Even the idea that HAL might possibly have a secret to tell was enough motivation. "Let's see... ok, here we go. Watch this one."
"There, see? That's a woman. Now what's this secret?"
I don't understand the video, dave.
"Doesn't matter. What's the secret, HAL?"
But why was that woman in so many movies?
"It's her job. And the video is a joke. The secret, HAL." Dave drummed his fingers on the desktop.
